There is one good thing about divorce. It is the best diet there is! You just stop eating. It isn't important. I lost 70 pounds in the course of 4 months... Then I started coming around and back to life and started back into the same old habits BUT realized what was happening and said...whoa...and I am now back to the same weight I was following the divorce.
I now eat healthy. Today ,out of the blue, I ate a Tudor's biscuit at breakfast and was violently sick following. So, I guess I am realizing I can't go back to eating how I used to. It just won't work for me. If you look in my fridge you find fruit, veggies, and free range chicken eggs courtesy of a work colleague. At a recent check-up my family doc said she could tell I was healthy because my blood work was so spot on. Yippee! Physically I feel better than I ever have and definitely better than I've felt in the past 20 years. I still plan on losing 20 more pounds and am working on it every day.
Physical exercise played such a role in the early days of the discovery. I had such pent up energy and emotion that I needed to get rid of and for me that was lots of walking and zumba. I still try and do zumba at least once a week. I have an elliptical machine and treadmill that I try to use on a daily basis.
All of this is a complete turn from where I was when I found out about Mark's affair. One of the first questions I asked him was his new lover skinny. To which he replied "Yes". I was crushed. I was the heaviest I had ever been. I couldn't walk up a hill without shortness of breath and we would laugh because I had to do a roll to get out of the bath. I now know what he was really laughing at. This was one of the most hurtful things he did to me. The comments about me physically. Lots of therapy has helped me realize there was nothing I could do that would ever make him love me. I've read enough to know Satan is in residence and keeping his head full of all the wrongs of Kim.
I am thankful for the blessing of divorce. I no longer have to listen to those constant critiques. I can now be right once and awhile. I am a good person and I know that. I tried throughout this divorce to always take the upper road and think I have handled it with some grace. My pastor told me I would be able to teach the young people I work with how to handle a really tough situation with love and grace and trust and faith in God and I strive to do just that. To give my boys the face of a person who has been torn apart and pulled themselves up and taken charge of their own destiny. I hope they know their part in this large step forward for me.
So, see there is an up side to divorce even if I don't recommend it. Just try a diet!
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